Movie review thread...
-
Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare
Lots of explosions (all the same), lots of gunfights (all the same), lots of dead-pan comments (all the same), lots of exciting music (all the same), lots of knifings (all the same).
Boring as fuck.
1 poo out of 5 crocks of shit.
-
I rewatched the latest Indiana Jones film again.
I’ve revised my opinion, it is the worst in the series ( even without Shia le Dickbrain ) Harrison’s grumpy old man schtick is tiresome, his allies were irritating and Mads what’s his name phoned it in.
The time travel stuff was absolutely beyond the realms of entertaining bullshit, it was just bullshit.
My revised order is a very clear 1, 3, 2…..
Daylight……
4………
5…….
They should have stopped in 1989 when Harrison, Sean and the others rode off into the sunset.
-
Yes please
-
Happy Birthday America!!!
It's my first Independence Day in 'murica - so I decided to watch... not Independence Day.
On my first Independence Eve in the US-of-A - I decided to download:- Coming To America (2021 version)
- Team America: World Police
- American Assassin
- Civil War
During the day, somebody reminded me I'd neglected to consider American Ninja.
So - after a day of "bar-hopping" (and watching my new favorite sports team the Mariners kick ass... (with a bases clearing double in the 7th!)
... I watched American Ninja...- So fucking good
- So fucking bad
At this point I've had too much America, too much beer, too much fireworks, to do it justice, but...
- The first 5 minutes is fucking classic. It's great litmus... endure that - you can do the movie. Not? Fair enough - this movie ain't for you.
- A US military car where the logo/labelling is "official use only". A car - not a document.
- an understanding of physics which leads me to believe the Fast'n'Furious script writers are descended from these pricks. Some great stuff.
- Bad guy ninjas. A head ninja who demonstrates his talent to a client by fighting multiple students, and then ends it by killing the last one standing.... therefore... his best student. The 2nd best ninja. Dead now. Despite all the other problems with that... Poor motivation. Poor teaching technique.
- Good guy ninjas. Just.. dumb. I'm getting tired now, good-guy-ninja-guru was pretty stoic. Good-guy-ninja-student took that stoicism to 2010-level degree of teenage-brooding-bullshit. We/they were doing it in the 80s.
- Tit-watch: zero. But I saw in the eyes of the Colonel's Daughter... she wanted to get them out. Fucking hell, she was fighting the director - she so wanted to get those puppies out.
-
-
@Bovidae also enjoyed it way more than i was expecting, it was a complete nod to the originals though, so if you didnt like them, you wont start now. Soundtrack was also fitting, the only odd thing was the Shooter McGavin cameo.. Netflix must be making both this and Happy Gilmore sequel
-
Schlock director David Decoteau comments on a review of one of his movies:
"I read a review that compared the style of this film to that of watching a security camera feed, and they were completely wrong in that assessment because a Security Camera usually moves from side to side!"
-
American Ninja 2 : The Confrontation
This is not a good movie.
I don't even know where this movie is set. The local thug has a Saffa accent. It seems to be an island, or archipelago... Pacific or Caribbean? The local (spoiler) corrupt police chief is rather sub-continental-asian, down to pith helmet. There is a "Governor" - who seems rather British, and seems to be corrupt, but bizarrely forgiven. There is an US-American embassy.Anyway, to more important things...
- The protagonis-chick isn't as hot as AN-1.
- Neither does she have that "I wanna get tit-watch-rating above zero" look in her eyes.
- And therefore, obviously, tit-watch is zero. There's lots of talk very early on about how the girls at the beaches in this weird unidentifiable place DO get the puppies out, and not just that... even the bum + front-bum out on the beach - but the subsequent montage goes no further than some lovely ladies lying on their fronts, with all bums covered. Typical Marine bullshitting. Semper Fib.
5 average marines kicking the ass of "Super-Ninjas" out of 5 "Super-Ninjas" kicking the ass of marines. This movie didn't make a lick of sense.
And what is with the subtitle? What "confrontation"? This was a random "American Ninja" encountering a random drug lord with a random pet ninja. Absolutely nothing worthy of "The Confrontation".
Not a very good movie. I stand by my 5/5 rating though. Must watch. -
@Bovidae said in Movie review thread...:
Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F
Better than I was expecting, and great fun. There are plenty of references to the original movie, including the music. You just knew who the bad guy was due to the casting.Have made it through the first 30 minutes so far before I had visitors and had to stop watching ( side note: I fucken hate it when people TURN UP without calling/messaging first. Fucken rude, I’m off to the GOM thread after this ). Completely agree about the music and Eddie has had some good lines as well as the inevitable quips about his age.
-
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@Bovidae said in Movie review thread...:
Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F
Better than I was expecting, and great fun. There are plenty of references to the original movie, including the music. You just knew who the bad guy was due to the casting.Have made it through the first 30 minutes so far before I had visitors and had to stop watching ( side note: I fucken hate it when people TURN UP without calling/messaging first. Fucken rude, I’m off to the GOM thread after this ). Completely agree about the music and Eddie has had some good lines as well as the inevitable quips about his age.
Watched Axel F tonight. Very nostalgic, but very well done. Captured the spirit of the first film, but gave it a little twist. Cameos from old faces was great too
-
-
@Bovidae said in Movie review thread...:
Deadpool & Wolverine
Fuckin' brilliant. So many laughs, cameo appearances, in-jokes, dialogue directed at Fox and Disney, and breaking the fourth wall moments.
Marvel Jesus. Ha!Most disappointing spoiler ever!
-
-
@Frank said in Movie review thread...:
“Racism is not dead, but it is on life support – kept alive by politicians, race hustlers and people who get a sense of superiority by denouncing others as ‘racists’ ” ~ Thomas Sowell
Ooooooooooohhhhhh
BORAcisT
Can't wait to see the fallout from this
-
i had the misfortune of watching "American Underdog - The Kurt Warner Story" last night.
god it's lucky i had a couple of wines, what a boring load of shit. You can tell that Kurt and his wife had a fair say in teh writing. It was actually far less preachy than i was expecting given Kurt's previous utterances, and it being produced by a Christian movie company.
This dude actually has an interesting story to tell. But this movie ain't it. According to this film, Kurt got picked because heart, and it was his time. Kurt, it could also have been all the fucking football you played, all over the place.
Also, can you tell me why you didn't have any money at all if you went to college for 5 years? is it because you are a selfish asshole?
The NFL is a sport that makes fucking great movies. This is not one of them. Avoid at all costs.
-
-
-
After watching Axel F I decided to watch the three original films. After the freshness of the first film, the second was okay but followed the same formula as the first. BHC3 was an abomination and it's no wonder it took them 30 odd years before anyone would let Eddie Murphy make a fourth. I did spot a cameo by George Lucas though, which did nothing to salvage the wreck
