Bad/Lame Jokes

[Bones]

If you serve your kids frozen pizza or chicken nuggets for dinner, you are a terrible parent...I don't care how busy you are.

Find the time to microwave them.

[booboo]

@Bones the kids?

[booboo]

Did you hear about the five ants who rented a room with five other ants?

Now they're tenants.

[canefan]

@booboo said in Bad/Lame Jokes:

Did you hear about the five ants who rented a room with five other ants?

Now they're tenants.

Definitely fills the brief

[Victor Meldrew]

[Victor Meldrew]

@booboo said in Bad/Lame Jokes:

@Bones the kids?

"I like children. I like them well-done" - WC Fields

[MN5]

My Grandad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.

He told me it was worth investing in good speakers

[Victor Meldrew]

[MN5]

I wanted to learn how to do the splits so I phoned the local gym asking if they could teach me.

They asked how flexible I was, I said I can’t do Tuesdays or Thursday’s but any other days were fine.

[MiketheSnow]

[MiketheSnow]

[MiketheSnow]

[MN5]

“I’m sorry” and “I apologise” mean exactly the same thing……

Except when you’re at a funeral

[No Quarter]

I asked my daughter to pass me the phone book.

She laughed at me, called me a dinosaur, and handed me her iPhone.

So anyway… now the spider is dead, the iPhone is broken, and my daughter is really unhappy

[MN5]

I was arguing with this guy who said he was a really famous singer in the 1980s.

I didn’t believe him but he was adamant

[Victor Meldrew]

[Bones]

[MN5]

Everyone in the 80s listening to music on boom boxes.

That's a bit of a stereotype.

[nostrildamus]

@MN5 said in Bad/Lame Jokes:

I didn’t believe him but he was adamant

I heard Marvel used his bones to make Wolverine. There must be something inside.

[Victor Meldrew]