Movie review thread...
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Nick, sounds like they were both Days of Thunder rip offs, or was that Top Gun. You know I can never tell the difference although one might have had planes in it.
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<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="NTA" data-cid="396100" data-time="1381194681">
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<p><em>Planes</em> - fuck. Cars universe. Might as well have just called it Cars. Same old shit but instead of a hotshot rookie learning he's a douche, it was a feelgood rookie learning he's not a complete retard. With a crusty old instructor hiding a past tragedy. Look, my kids enjoyed it, but my highlight was my daughter vomiting up popcorn all over her seat (24 hour gastro no doubt from the local bogans pissing in the public pool - had to start right there). Amusingly, she also chucked on the way to the bathroom. Right outside the door of the cinema. Twice. It was wall to wall stomach acid and bits of corn. Thankfully not in the new car.</p>
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<p>Out.</p>
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<p>Haha, TR Jnr asked to go see that and I said that it just looked like Cars, but with Planes, so he changed his mind ot Percy Jackson, which he thought was awesome!</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Kirwan" data-cid="396053" data-time="1381188370">
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<p>Saw gravity, one of the few films worth seeing in 3D. Really enjoyed it</p>
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<p>Saw it today in Imax 3D. The 90 minutes just flew by, very engrossing. I also saw Rush last week. Loved it as well. Bruhl's performance as Niki Lauda was fantastic. I am going to go again, and take my dad who was (during that time period) and still is a huge F1 fan</p> -
<p>About Time</p>
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<p>From the man who brought us Four Weddings, Notting Hill, Love Actually and err ... Blackadder - take a bow Richard Curtis.</p>
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<p>Sacharine sweet, middle class John Lewis advert, featuring the lazy-ass plot device of ... time travel! That's right, dad (Bill Nighy) tells gauche, ginger son (Domnhall Gleeson) on his 21st birthday that male family members can jump back in time, although only in their own lifetime.</p>
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<p>Cue hero's (Gleeson) use of time travel in the pursuit of money? (no), power? (wrong again), righting wrongs? (getting colder), but instead LOVE! Of course this sad loser can't get a girl on his own so he jumps backwards to get it right and ensnare the one girl who he actually managed to get off with in the first place. Think Hugh Grant in full bumbling 4W&AF mode doing the Bill Murray and Andi McDowell bar scene from Groundhog Day.</p>
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<p>Sounds shit? Well, yes, when you write it like that. But, it is kinda fun, with some great gags and sublime cameos from the usual Curtis crowd. Take the missus and earn some points, but be prepared for the look that says "why can't you go back in time and sort out all the shit we've been through?"</p> -
<p>Flight - True story with Denzel in the lead as a addict commercial pilot who somehow landed a plane after some mechanical failures whilst high and drunk, pretty decent watch.</p>
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<p>KIck Ass 2 - that is all....</p> -
<p>Pacific Rim - Yet again disappointed by a film that promised so much yet delivered 'meh' (Prometheus im looking at you).</p>
<p>Enjoyable enough and the usual ingredients were superb (CGI, action sequences), but the other parts that are sometimes handy to have in a movie, you know a good story, acting, no major plot holes and predictable moments you see coming a mile away.</p>
<p>The main star whos the dude from SOA looks to be the new Sam Worthington, about as much acting range as a tree stump.</p>
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<p>7/10</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="NTA" data-cid="396100" data-time="1381194681">
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<p><em>Turbo</em> - a racing snail. Some funny moments. Not bad. Was it worth seeing at the cinema? Yeah for adults at kids prices I guess it entertained them.</p>
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<p>Took the kids to see this on Saturday, TR Jnr thought it was alright, Miss TR was walking around bored after about an hour...luckily theatre was almost empty, I was a bit disappointed TBH, not up there with the other 'kids' animated movies I have seen in the past few years.</p>
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<p>Elysium - it was ok, a bit meh TBH and a typically cheesy ending.</p> -
Mr Pip.<br><br>So the film of the book by Bob Jones' brother featuring Dr House with screenwriting and direction by the Shrek geezer.<br><br>Apparently it got "mixed" reviews when it premiered at Toronto a year ago although the audience loved it. Anyways Andrew Adamson said Toronto was too early but too good an opportunity to turn down and the film was unfinished at that time and he's spent a year since then in post production. So whats it like?<br><br>I didn't know a helluva lot about Bougaineville at the time but it appears to have all the trappings of a nasty little central African civil war.<br><br>The movie itself is very professional, lush and gorgeously filmed. Looks like one of those Gaugain paintings of Tahiti - both the scenery and the costumes.<br><br>First half plays out like a typical redeeming schoolteacher story although you do get a sense of foreboding overlaying it all. Second half deals with the cynical brutality of conflicts in a very understated, matter of fact and therefore very effective way. Theres a surprise coda as well.<br><br>I
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<p>I watched "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" last night. What a pile of shit. It held my attention, but mainly as i was still hungover from Saturday night. Gemma Arterton is pretty hot, but can't act for shit (seriously, the bitches face doesn't move). Should really just nude up and get it over with. Is there a less charismatic action "star" than Jeremy Renner? Famke Jansen was good to look at in the non-makeup bits as well. And the ranga who does nude up.</p>
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<p>Some glaringly shitty plot holes, and amazingly convenient coincidences abound. Watch if you're looking to kill an hour twenty while you are recovering from too much boozing. </p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="mariner4life" data-cid="397228" data-time="1381687788">
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<p>I watched "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" last night. What a pile of shit. It held my attention, but mainly as i was still hungover from Saturday night. Gemma Arterton is pretty hot, but can't act for shit (seriously, the bitches face doesn't move). Should really just nude up and get it over with. Is there a less charismatic action "star" than Jeremy Renner? Famke Jansen was good to look at in the non-makeup bits as well. And the ranga who does nude up.</p>
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<p>Some glaringly shitty plot holes, and amazingly convenient coincidences abound. Watch if you're looking to kill an hour twenty while you are recovering from too much boozing. </p>
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<p>Thank you for for the honest appraisal there.</p>
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<p>I think we need a grading system for films</p>
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<p>See it at the movies</p>
<p>Wait for the dvd</p>
<p>Wait till its a $3.50 8 day hire</p>
<p>Wait till it's on sky /free to air it's to shitty to pay for.</p>
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<p>Also there should be mitigating factors i.e. lots of plot holes but it has tits and or even better some famous chick trying to be edgy by getting nude .For example Anne Hattheway used to make the sort of shit you wouldn't force of prisoners at Abu Ghraib , decided to shed the princess movie image and made Havoc which contains lots of female nudity .</p> -
I made the mistake of watching the latest version of The 3 Musketeers.<br><br>
No redeeming features at all. No comedy, no hot chicks getting their gear off, no hot chicks actually. The sword fighting is passable but not epic and that's what it should be.<br><br>
Stupid air ship battles and quite a good cast absolutely wasted.<br><br>
Free to air or better yet avoid, avoid, avoid. -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="NTA" data-cid="397265" data-time="1381704781">
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<p>You're over thinking it. Just mark it on the M4L shits n tits scale:<br><br>
Shit<br>
Shit with tits<br>
Tits<br>
TITS!<br>
TIIIIIIIIITS!<br>
Muff</p>
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<p>Where would flight fit into your rating system? I don't think you can quite express the fat it's a decent movie with very early Nadine Valasquez full frontal nudity with such a simplistic rating system.</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="jegga" data-cid="397287" data-time="1381725198"><p>Where would flight fit into your rating system? I don't think you can quite express the fat it's a decent movie with very early Nadine Valasquez full frontal nudity with such a simplistic rating system.</p></blockquote>
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Definitely muff -
Yeah as soon as there is muff, all bets are off.
But if you'd like to have a bit more structure, you could include the approximate minute/chapter number the muff appears in eg
You're at the movies, and it's muff. Check your watch, then it gets Muff35m
At home, the DVD has the muff in chapter 8 so it's a Muff 8c
This is to help your fellow movie goers if the rest of the flick is shit
Note this doesn't apply to tits ratings unless it's two sets touching each other
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<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="NTA" data-cid="397308" data-time="1381735492">
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<p>Yeah as soon as there is muff, all bets are off. But if you'd like to have a bit more structure, you could include the approximate minute/chapter number the muff appears in eg You're at the movies, and it's muff. Check your watch, then it gets Muff35m At home, the DVD has the muff in chapter 8 so it's a Muff 8c This is to help your fellow movie goers if the rest of the flick is shit Note this doesn't apply to tits ratings unless it's two sets touching each other</p>
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<p>Hmm, sounds eerily similar to a website someone tried to develop in a movie....</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="NTA" data-cid="397308" data-time="1381735492"><p>
Yeah as soon as there is muff, all bets are off.But if you'd like to have a bit more structure, you could include the approximate minute/chapter number the muff appears in eg You're at the movies, and it's muff. Check your watch, then it gets Muff35mAt home, the DVD has the muff in chapter 8 so it's a Muff 8cThis is to help your fellow movie goers if the rest of the flick is shitNote this doesn't apply to tits ratings unless it's two sets touching each other</p></blockquote>
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That's what dailymotion is for, if the mrs suggests we watch a DVD/ movie together I want to know I can fall asleep on the couch safe in the knowledge I'm not missing a " key plot device" cos she sure as fuck ain't going to rewind for me,
