Movie review thread...

Tim

Every year I post Raymond Chandler's essay Oscar Night in Hollywood. <a data-ipb='nomediaparse' class="bbc_url" href='http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/1948/03/oscar-night-in-hollywood/305705/'>http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/1948/03/oscar-night-in-hollywood/305705/</a>

mariner4life

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Sneakdefreak" data-cid="417188" data-time="1393795467">
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Watched the Big Lebowski for the first time last night (it was on C4). Not too shabby. 'Is this your homework Larry?' scene was hilarious. 7/10

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i fucking love this movie

Luigi

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Tim" data-cid="417046" data-time="1393664792">
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The Armstrong Lie. Armstrong compulsively lies.
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Aww, Tim - you coulda put a spoiler alert in there fella!
 
But yes, turns out he's a big fucking liar.
 
Fascinating movie though.

red terror

It was released 30 years ago (yesterday).

Still one of the funniest satirical movies I've ever seen.

taniwharugby

Thor - the dark world. 
8.5 on paper, 6.5 on screen. 
Kinda Star Wars-ish with Thor

red terror

I rented a DVD yesterday blindly - never heard of it, didn't know anything about it called "It's a Disaster."
 
<img src="http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTQwNjYzMTQ0Ml5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNDUzODM5Nw@@.V1_SX214.jpg" alt="MV5BMTQwNjYzMTQ0Ml5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNDUz">
 
David Cross was in it, and that was good enough for me. It starts out as 4 couples at a brunch, with Cross and Julia Styles on their 3rd date... with the conventional, indie romantic comedy cliches... kinda restrained... and then somebody detonates VX gas in the city and things get really interesting. I enjoyed it and laughed throughout most of it. 7.5/10

Catogrande

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="taniwharugby" data-cid="417962" data-time="1394306950">Thor - the dark world. 8.5 on paper, 6.5 on screen. Kinda Star Wars-ish with Thor</blockquote> Yep, Star Wars (including sound effects) plus Nordic mysticism. Felt this was poor really. 6.5 is generous.

Sneakdefreak

Watched an 80s horror/comedy last night called The Monster Squad. About a bunch of kids who have to stop Dracula, the Werewolf, the Mummy, the creature from the Black Lagoon and Frankenstein's monster from locating an amulet. 5.5/10

antipodean

<div><a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1815862/'>After Earth</a> with Will Smith and his son. Proof that artistic talent isn't genetic. If I was to rate this abomination one star out of ten, it might falsely encourage you to see it. It isn't just bad, it is fucking woeful.</div>
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<div>Or at least the first 10 minutes were. I don't know what happens after that. No one should.</div>
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<div>Also I finally got around to watching '<a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0949731/'>The Happening</a>'. The English language has not yet evolved a sufficient vocabulary to adequately describe this travesty and until it does, these two words will have to suffice; fucking shit.</div>

Tim

You were tied up and forced to watch The Happening, then 10 minutes into After Earth you used your safe word?

antipodean

I sat in amazement that those were apparently the best takes sewn together. Almost as if Wahlberg decided to see if the director was actually paying attention.

red terror

The Village (2004)
Lady in the Water (2006)
The Happening (2008)
The Last Airbender (2010)
After Earth (2013)
 
A decade of excellence, and quite possibly the awesome-ist 5-movie streak in film history.

mariner4life

have a new entrant into the "shittest movies i have watched" file (headed up by Eyes Wide Shut and Vanilla Sky).
 
So, i watched GI Joe: Retaliation last night (hey, there was nothing else to do). Now, remembering how shit the first one was, i set my expectations pretty low. But, they were still not met. Not even the Rock, and the main chicks big porn titties (that she didn't get out) could save this turd. This was worse than the first one. At least the first one was cheesy because they weren't taking themselves seriously. This i think was trying to be a more adult action movie, and it failed, horribly. You know it's a movie based on an 80s product when ninja are still front and centre. 
 
Avoid this movie at all costs. Do not waste your time. The Rock should be more embarrassed by this than the Tooth Fairy. As for Bruce Willis.....

red terror

I fuckin' love Eyes Wide Shut.

mariner4life

really? holy shit. really? why? not even gratuitous nudity is enough to save that pile of shit. i was soooo bored watching it. I only stuck it out because i thought it must go somewhere (you know, because everybody says everything Kubrik does is perfect). It didn't, and i needed a drink. boooooring.

Nepia

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="mariner4life" data-cid="418661" data-time="1394761280">
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have a new entrant into the "shittest movies i have watched" file (headed up by Eyes Wide Shut and Vanilla Sky).
 
So, i watched GI Joe: Retaliation last night (hey, there was nothing else to do). Now, remembering how shit the first one was, i set my expectations pretty low. But, they were still not met. Not even the Rock, and the main chicks big porn titties (that she didn't get out) could save this turd. This was worse than the first one. At least the first one was cheesy because they weren't taking themselves seriously. This i think was trying to be a more adult action movie, and it failed, horribly. You know it's a movie based on an 80s product when ninja are still front and centre. 
 
Avoid this movie at all costs. Do not waste your time. The Rock should be more embarrassed by this than the Tooth Fairy. As for Bruce Willis.....
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I liked it, much better than the first one which I thought was a real turd, but then I'm a huge GI Joe fan from the 80s - I'm currently re-reading the entire series on my tablet*. The ninjas are awesome ... that's what GI Joe essentially became. I actually think the complete opposite to you, they tried to take the first one too seriously and this one they went cheesy - the final attack was cheesy as fudge.
 
I don't get Eyes Wide Shut either, but I think Kubrick is overrated. Vanilla Sky is ok - I find criticism of it compared with Open Your Eyes quite hilarious as it's the same bloody film.
 
* Are there any Battle Action Force comic fans out there? It was the british version of GI Joe in a 2000AD style comic with other stories like Johnny Red and Charlies War - and initially the Action Force were different and fought the Red Baron instead of Cobra. If someone knows where I can fight digitised copies of it I would be very grateful.

mariner4life

the first one had the stupidest Wayan in it, how fucking serious do you think they took it?

Nepia

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="mariner4life" data-cid="418681" data-time="1394768815">
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the first one had the stupidest Wayan in it, how fucking serious do you think they took it?
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He was the comic relief - everyone was the comic relief in the sequel.

mariner4life

i get the impression they weren't trying to be. that;s my issue. it sucked, and i look down on you for liking it...

Nepia

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="mariner4life" data-cid="418686" data-time="1394769271">
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i get the impression they weren't trying to be. that;s my issue. it sucked, and i look down on you for liking it...
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Thats fine, I look down on you for thinking the first is better and thinking that it wasn't taking itself seriously. Hoik (that's me spitting at your feet).

The Silver Fern

Movie review thread...