Parenting
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@No-Quarter said in Parenting:
@ACT-Crusader having 5 kids goes a long way to explaining his repetitive ongoing team selection Dad joke. The dude must be a fucking master at driving his kids insane with the same jokes over and over.
I might not get 5 laughs every time I tell my dad jokes at home but at least I get 5 upvotes for my AB selections.
Shout out to @Chris-B @Canerbry @shark @Chris @Stargazer
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5?????
Holy shit man, you're a lunatic.
Came here to post this. I had cold sweats even thinking about it!
Haha. Don’t worry we get the ‘look’ when we all go out together.
In all seriousness though, I feel very fortunate to be able to have children. Many whanau and friends who have tried and haven’t been able to have kids it has brought heartache and disappointment. My wife and I are pretty chill about things when it comes to the kids. We’re definitely not those ones where every conversation is brought back to what our little Johnny or Jane are doing or always offering advice just because we have more kids than so and so.
Like someone posted earlier, we are all learning along the way. There are no “experts” in my view because no two experiences are the same because no two kids or parents are the same. All we can do is share our experiences. I’ve learned some stuff from this thread.
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@ACT-Crusader My first thought when I saw you had 5 kids was what car do you drive ....
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Cracking thread team. Amazing how many things I read on this I find myself nodding along to ... Especially around the confidence of kids.
My son wouldn't even put his head under water until he was about 5. Infuriating when you are shelling out thousands in swimming lessons / pool access etc. OF course, he's now 8 and can swim like a fish (although not in the Rancid' son category), so we really had nothing to worry about.
He got some new trainers today. The sheer joy on his face about this new trainers brought me back to being a kid again. Which ultimately is I think, what most of the parenting joys are about.
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The helicopter parenting thing and what it does to a kids self confidence is pretty important I’d say. Mrs Cato and I have very different ideas around how you look after and discipline kids. She is of Mediterranean extraction and her (and her mum and sisters) are like caricature Italian mommas. (Though not Italian themselves ). Cue lots of screaming and shouting followed immediately by guilt laden gifts of sweets etc. Mixed messages is not in it. With Ms Cato No1 she mollycoddled her, feeding her fears and phobias to the extent that she now has mild but continuous hypochondria. As I saw this happening and being powerless to stop it, the rot having been set in, I had to do my best to manage it and then ensure the same thing did not happen with Ms Cato No2. We did suffer some dreadful times with No1, including bad boyfriend choices, drugs and depression, but you find a way of getting through it intact.
However despite all that we now have two really good young adults that we are both proud of and that are decent human beings. One has branched out, one still lives at home. Guess which one.
My message would be that it is the values you instil in your kids that will be the most formative thing you can do for them. Everything else is just part of the journey.
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@ACT-Crusader aren’t the dad jokes why you become a dad
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@ACT-Crusader aren’t the dad jokes why you become a dad
I make mine worse for them by saying the joke
And then saying out loud "hashtag dad joke"
And then making finger guns at them
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@mariner4life
that’s awesome I say hashtag in front of things the just get filthy looks from Mrs Mikey....but it’s soo worth it -
@MajorRage said in Parenting:
@ACT-Crusader My first thought when I saw you had 5 kids was what car do you drive ....
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@ACT-Crusader I knew you were a sleeper Canes supporter! Go the Yellow bus!!
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@ACT-Crusader liar. You drive a Bongo van
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If only I had...
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@ACT-Crusader just missing some pointy white hoods bro.
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@ACT-Crusader said in Parenting:
@No-Quarter said in Parenting:
@ACT-Crusader having 5 kids goes a long way to explaining his repetitive ongoing team selection Dad joke. The dude must be a fucking master at driving his kids insane with the same jokes over and over.
I might not get 5 laughs every time I tell my dad jokes at home but at least I get 5 upvotes for my AB selections.
Shout out to @Chris-B @Canerbry @shark @Chris @Stargazer
Tagging people and blatantly fishing for upvotes.
This is a new fern low
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Without distracting us overly much from this awesome thread - when was the last time you checked your kids search history?
Incognito kiddos, incognito!
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@ACT-Crusader said in Parenting:
In my view kids need to be challenged. They need opportunities to build resilience. They need hard lessons. But they also need to learn love and trust. More often than not it’s the little things done consistently that make the biggest difference. What those little things are different for each kid.
Upvote this! But also in a slightly different context.
Little things done consistently will create a framework of boundaries. Letting them know when they have overstepped those boundaries or are close to it and providing consequences when they have busted the boundary is a key. Also be prepared to adjust those boundaries out when trust is gained. Kind of like a dog
I'll refrain from the 'in my day' comments as I feel you guys seem to be dealing with a slightly different world that your kids are growing up in. I'm amazed at how young all of your kids are when you aren't that much younger than me!
We were quite lucky in that our son spent his younger years with his grandparents during the day and on the farm. You don't have much option but to just get on with things and listen to what you are being told in those circumstances.
Certainly can't say he was perfect. As they all do there were phases where you wonder what you have done to create a surly, lazy shit that has to be asked multiple times to do things but looking back it is just a growing up/hormonal thing.All I know is that we ended up with a kid that we couldn't be prouder of. Has his head screwed on (more than us) and has a great partner.
Given you're at least 5 years older than me (somewhere recently you said you were at Uni in 1982 ... ), and I reckon most of these blokes are about 10 years younger than me (based on their taste in music...) I reckon you're kind of a little in denial about your age dude ... just step away from the Grecian 2000 ...
Still think most, if not all, of us here seem to be tending toward being caring concerned parents.
And therefore hopefully our kids are heading in the right direction.
@antipodean 's Jesuit maxim rings true.
BTW MBJ was buzzing on arrival home from school today: exams done.
Makes one feel so much better that they're happy.
