Movie review thread...
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@tim said in Re: Movie review thread...:
In America, there's a burglary every 11 seconds, an armed robbery every 65 seconds, a violent crime every 25 seconds, a murder every 24 minutes and 250 rapes a day.
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@antipodean this right here is fucking top level Ferning
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@antipodean said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@tim said in Re: Movie review thread...:
In America, there's a burglary every 11 seconds, an armed robbery every 65 seconds, a violent crime every 25 seconds, a murder every 24 minutes and 250 rapes a day.
Crime is a disease. He's the cure
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Holy shit Starship Troopers is great fun especially if you haven’t seen it in years.
Still awesome, enough of a piss take to be a bit of a laugh along with some incredible sci fi action.
4.5 what’s your malfunction Rico out of 5 the only good bug is a dead bug.
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@mn5 said in Re: Movie review thread...:
Holy shit Starship Troopers is great fun especially if you haven’t seen it in years.
Still awesome, enough of a piss take to be a bit of a laugh along with some incredible sci fi action.
4.5 what’s your malfunction Rico out of 5 the only good bug is a dead bug.
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@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@tim said in Re: Movie review thread...:
I'm watching the latest dadsploitation movie, Nobody. Now the inciting incident is beating up some guys because they were drunk and got on a bus? They're really have given up.
I think you might have missed some bits.
I'm right in the middle of this, as I said earlier in the thread can't understand how much you guys are hyping it and conversely can't understand how much @Tim is hating on it.
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The Little Things
Well... what a crock of shit.
Expectations were middling after the recommendations/references earlier in this thread - but even in the initial scene of "girl being stalked - oh how scary" - shit, how many things to pick apart in that?
And then the actual "detective procedural"/"mystery crime thriller" starts...- the one and only interesting mystery in this was figuring out how the movie got to be made.
And it's not that much of a mystery, it seems fairly obvious...
A shitty crime-thriller is presented to some movie companies in the 90s.
It is rightly dismissed as crap.
Se7en comes out, and is a hit.
Somebody finds this script, and says "Hey - if we re-worked this to be heaps more like Se7en - we could make some money"
So somebody re-writes bits so that there is a semi-idealistic white kid detective with a lovable family, a jaded black detective, and a psychological show-down in the middle of nowhere
But then, the real twist - it gets made... 25 fucking years later. - TL;DR: This really was like an Asylum-level Se7en remake, but 25 years after the fact, and somehow managing to cast Denzel and Mr Robot, amongst a decent supporting cast
Just... What The Actual Fuck. I like digging holes, but I ain't gonna dig more than one if I've got a guy who I legitimately think is a murderous fluffybunny to do it for me.
2 "Dig This Hole For Me, Prick"s, out of 5 "Yeah, fair enough - that reveal of historic girl #3's death was a very, very slight redemption of the overall tripe"
- the one and only interesting mystery in this was figuring out how the movie got to be made.
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@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
The Little Things
Well... what a crock of shit.
Expectations were middling after the recommendations/references earlier in this thread - but even in the initial scene of "girl being stalked - oh how scary" - shit, how many things to pick apart in that?
And then the actual "detective procedural"/"mystery crime thriller" starts...- the one and only interesting mystery in this was figuring out how the movie got to be made.
And it's not that much of a mystery, it seems fairly obvious...
A shitty crime-thriller is presented to some movie companies in the 90s.
It is rightly dismissed as crap.
Se7en comes out, and is a hit.
Somebody finds this script, and says "Hey - if we re-worked this to be heaps more like Se7en - we could make some money"
So somebody re-writes bits so that there is a semi-idealistic white kid detective with a lovable family, a jaded black detective, and a psychological show-down in the middle of nowhere
But then, the real twist - it gets made... 25 fucking years later. - TL;DR: This really was like an Asylum-level Se7en remake, but 25 years after the fact, and somehow managing to cast Denzel and Mr Robot, amongst a decent supporting cast
Just... What The Actual Fuck. I like digging holes, but I ain't gonna dig more than one if I've got a guy who I legitimately think is a murderous fluffybunny to do it for me.
2 "Dig This Hole For Me, Prick"s, out of 5 "Yeah, fair enough - that reveal of historic girl #3's death was a very, very slight redemption of the overall tripe"
Hahaha, that was funny in a complete WTF is going on way, but as I mentioned earlier in the thread I think the Se7en comparisons are being way over done in relation to this movie.
- the one and only interesting mystery in this was figuring out how the movie got to be made.
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@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
The Little Things
The give away is when the same person writes, directs and produces a movie. You could say it's to protect the artistic vision, but normally it's cause no one else will touch it.
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The Courier
Based on the true story of Greville Wynne a British salesman who is recruited to transport Russian secrets in an effort to ease tensions in the Cuban missile crisis.
I know little of this guy to know how much is fact based but was a decent watch with Cumberbatch as Wynne.
3.5 WTF is he eating out of 5 its a Russian prison what do you think it could be...
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@antipodean said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
The Little Things
The give away is when the same person writes, directs and produces a movie. You could say it's to protect the artistic vision, but normally it's cause no one else will touch it.
Shit - I didn't notice that. That makes it worse... I assumed it was movie execs who had shoe-horned a shitty script into an even shittier movie by insisting on all the Se7en-parody bollocks.
But this was one guys vision, from start to finish? WTF?
And he was proud enough of it to actually release it to the public? He's shat out a monster - a morning-after-12-pints-of-Guiness monster of a turd - and then decided to put it in a glass box and parade it around in front of the family. -
@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@antipodean said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
The Little Things
The give away is when the same person writes, directs and produces a movie. You could say it's to protect the artistic vision, but normally it's cause no one else will touch it.
Shit - I didn't notice that. That makes it worse... I assumed it was movie execs who had shoe-horned a shitty script into an even shittier movie by insisting on all the Se7en-parody bollocks.
But this was one guys vision, from start to finish? WTF?
And he was proud enough of it to actually release it to the public? He's shat out a monster - a morning-after-12-pints-of-Guiness monster of a turd - and then decided to put it in a glass box and parade it around in front of the family.Upvote for the description.
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Rocky IV. Nuff said.
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@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@antipodean said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
The Little Things
The give away is when the same person writes, directs and produces a movie. You could say it's to protect the artistic vision, but normally it's cause no one else will touch it.
... Monster of a turd - and then decided to put it in a glass box and parade it around in front of the family.
Aaand I am immediately transported back to when a Roysl Marine that played at our club described his time aboard the Royal Yacht Britannia. Apparently some of the lower deck crew had isolated the plumbing and extracted a turd that was purportedly that of Princess Margaret and had mounted (said turd - for @Notrildamus) in a glass case.
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@catogrande said in Re: Movie review thread...:
and had mounted in a glass case.
had mounted the turd, not the princess, hopefully.
Back to your story...The souvenir was reputedly lost in a game of poker after someone had struck a royal flush. -
Terminator Dark Fate
Ok, it pretty much says it all when I can’t even sit through the whole thing. Such a confusing, yet tired, storyline ( which if I’m correct means the last three movies never happened ) and just rubbish all round. The first two Terminator movies are absolute classics but this franchise has taken a dive of Jaws like proportions.....big explosions and actions scenes but no tension and Arnies character settling down with a family ? Didn’t he get squashed in the first movie ? The female leads are all varying degrees of irritating and the evil unstoppable Terminator is just rehashing shit we’ve seen before.
Time for this series to be put permanently off line
1.5 bad Arnie acting out of 5 gratuitous explosions
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@tim O for awesome.
PS where in hell do you dig these things up from?
I mean I’ve tried typing in “shit films” and all I get is two fat naked chicks on a glass top coffee table.
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@catogrande close the living room door mate
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@bones said in Re: Movie review thread...:
@catogrande close the living room door mate
On the way out or on the way in? I need explicit instructions from an expert.
