Parenting
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Per the Straya thread https://www.forum.thesilverfern.com/topic/3682/straya/141 I mentioned my 14yo daughter chose today - a public holiday - to break up with her bf of roughly 13 months.
After a few episodes of drama, where the guy hereafter referred to as That Skinny Dickhead (TSD) started getting a bit on the needy side, she finally made her mind up that the pros weren't outweighing the cons. TSD had been accusing her of spending too much time with her friends and not enough time with him, even tho she has made multiple efforts to hang out with him this summer holidays and he finally came over to our house to meet us only a month ago.
Part of me feels for TSD - first of all he was punching well above his weight in looks, smarts, and personality - but he also appears to have a fairly ordinary home life and some health issues that keep him skinny. Doesn't sound like his Mum is much into fixing them. On the flipside, he's not sporty, not academic, and has spent most of the holiday period staying up late on his Xbox and then waking up after noon. And hey, 14yo me would have probably done something similar... if I had anything resembling an Xbox.... and if I didn't live on a farm...
Anyway, she did it. Quite impressed there is no wailing and bullshit from her at this point, and it is a load off her mind obviously.
If I might be a Grumpy Old Man for a moment: fucked up a perfectly good public holiday.
Is it normal behaviour for a Dad to be involved so much in teenage daughters boys life? Or are you a massive outlier in the relationship you have with your daughter.
Serious question.
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some health issues that keep him skinny.
Are these contagious, and how does one contract them?
Avoid the devilish temptation of the chocolate biscuits in the kitchen cupboards by not buying them in the first place your fat useless piece of shit.
Best dieting advice, ever.
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
some health issues that keep him skinny.
Are these contagious, and how does one contract them?
Avoid the devilish temptation of the chocolate biscuits in the kitchen cupboards by not buying them in the first place your fat useless piece of shit.
Best dieting advice, ever.
Fried foods, chips are my main kryptonite
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
Per the Straya thread https://www.forum.thesilverfern.com/topic/3682/straya/141 I mentioned my 14yo daughter chose today - a public holiday - to break up with her bf of roughly 13 months.
After a few episodes of drama, where the guy hereafter referred to as That Skinny Dickhead (TSD) started getting a bit on the needy side, she finally made her mind up that the pros weren't outweighing the cons. TSD had been accusing her of spending too much time with her friends and not enough time with him, even tho she has made multiple efforts to hang out with him this summer holidays and he finally came over to our house to meet us only a month ago.
Part of me feels for TSD - first of all he was punching well above his weight in looks, smarts, and personality - but he also appears to have a fairly ordinary home life and some health issues that keep him skinny. Doesn't sound like his Mum is much into fixing them. On the flipside, he's not sporty, not academic, and has spent most of the holiday period staying up late on his Xbox and then waking up after noon. And hey, 14yo me would have probably done something similar... if I had anything resembling an Xbox.... and if I didn't live on a farm...
Anyway, she did it. Quite impressed there is no wailing and bullshit from her at this point, and it is a load off her mind obviously.
If I might be a Grumpy Old Man for a moment: fucked up a perfectly good public holiday.
Is it normal behaviour for a Dad to be involved so much in teenage daughters boys life? Or are you a massive outlier in the relationship you have with your daughter.
Serious question.
Each to their own. But I have family friends and even work colleagues who stood by while their kids ended up with douche bags (girls and boys) who they knew were not right for them. FF years and broken homes later, if you can prevent it why not take an active interest
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
Per the Straya thread https://www.forum.thesilverfern.com/topic/3682/straya/141 I mentioned my 14yo daughter chose today - a public holiday - to break up with her bf of roughly 13 months.
After a few episodes of drama, where the guy hereafter referred to as That Skinny Dickhead (TSD) started getting a bit on the needy side, she finally made her mind up that the pros weren't outweighing the cons. TSD had been accusing her of spending too much time with her friends and not enough time with him, even tho she has made multiple efforts to hang out with him this summer holidays and he finally came over to our house to meet us only a month ago.
Part of me feels for TSD - first of all he was punching well above his weight in looks, smarts, and personality - but he also appears to have a fairly ordinary home life and some health issues that keep him skinny. Doesn't sound like his Mum is much into fixing them. On the flipside, he's not sporty, not academic, and has spent most of the holiday period staying up late on his Xbox and then waking up after noon. And hey, 14yo me would have probably done something similar... if I had anything resembling an Xbox.... and if I didn't live on a farm...
Anyway, she did it. Quite impressed there is no wailing and bullshit from her at this point, and it is a load off her mind obviously.
If I might be a Grumpy Old Man for a moment: fucked up a perfectly good public holiday.
Is it normal behaviour for a Dad to be involved so much in teenage daughters boys life? Or are you a massive outlier in the relationship you have with your daughter.
Serious question.
Each to their own. But I have family friends and even work colleagues who stood by while their kids ended up with douche bags (girls and boys) who they knew were not right for them. FF years and broken homes later, if you can prevent it why not take an active interest
Not a criticism, it's a question. Preparing myself for Miss about to turn 8's teenage years.
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
@majorrage said in Parenting:
Per the Straya thread https://www.forum.thesilverfern.com/topic/3682/straya/141 I mentioned my 14yo daughter chose today - a public holiday - to break up with her bf of roughly 13 months.
After a few episodes of drama, where the guy hereafter referred to as That Skinny Dickhead (TSD) started getting a bit on the needy side, she finally made her mind up that the pros weren't outweighing the cons. TSD had been accusing her of spending too much time with her friends and not enough time with him, even tho she has made multiple efforts to hang out with him this summer holidays and he finally came over to our house to meet us only a month ago.
Part of me feels for TSD - first of all he was punching well above his weight in looks, smarts, and personality - but he also appears to have a fairly ordinary home life and some health issues that keep him skinny. Doesn't sound like his Mum is much into fixing them. On the flipside, he's not sporty, not academic, and has spent most of the holiday period staying up late on his Xbox and then waking up after noon. And hey, 14yo me would have probably done something similar... if I had anything resembling an Xbox.... and if I didn't live on a farm...
Anyway, she did it. Quite impressed there is no wailing and bullshit from her at this point, and it is a load off her mind obviously.
If I might be a Grumpy Old Man for a moment: fucked up a perfectly good public holiday.
Is it normal behaviour for a Dad to be involved so much in teenage daughters boys life? Or are you a massive outlier in the relationship you have with your daughter.
Serious question.
Each to their own. But I have family friends and even work colleagues who stood by while their kids ended up with douche bags (girls and boys) who they knew were not right for them. FF years and broken homes later, if you can prevent it why not take an active interest
Not a criticism, it's a question. Preparing myself for Miss about to turn 8's teenage years.
It wasn't a criticism mate, just my point of view. I don't want Miss CF to end up with some punchable face douche bag. Even worse if they have kids then split, then fuck them up. Nothing is assured, but I'm all for a little intervention for the right reasons
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Per the Straya thread https://www.forum.thesilverfern.com/topic/3682/straya/141 I mentioned my 14yo daughter chose today - a public holiday - to break up with her bf of roughly 13 months.
After a few episodes of drama, where the guy hereafter referred to as That Skinny Dickhead (TSD) started getting a bit on the needy side, she finally made her mind up that the pros weren't outweighing the cons. TSD had been accusing her of spending too much time with her friends and not enough time with him, even tho she has made multiple efforts to hang out with him this summer holidays and he finally came over to our house to meet us only a month ago.
Part of me feels for TSD - first of all he was punching well above his weight in looks, smarts, and personality - but he also appears to have a fairly ordinary home life and some health issues that keep him skinny. Doesn't sound like his Mum is much into fixing them. On the flipside, he's not sporty, not academic, and has spent most of the holiday period staying up late on his Xbox and then waking up after noon. And hey, 14yo me would have probably done something similar... if I had anything resembling an Xbox.... and if I didn't live on a farm...
Anyway, she did it. Quite impressed there is no wailing and bullshit from her at this point, and it is a load off her mind obviously.
If I might be a Grumpy Old Man for a moment: fucked up a perfectly good public holiday.
The drama probably isn't over yet. He'll make a farking Tiktok video about it or something. Or he'll commit self-harm after watching a farking Tiktok video. Social media has created a new level of demented.
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
Is it normal behaviour for a Dad to be involved so much in teenage daughters boys life? Or are you a massive outlier in the relationship you have with your daughter.
Serious question.
Dunno if it is "normal", but I have a pretty good relationship with the daughter unit.I've tried to cultivate a sense of respect between myself and the kids. The clear intent I've stated is that I am happy to listen, happy to provide advice, but that they're under no obligation to take it. Further, I promise not to dive deep into their problems and try to fix all their shit without being asked.
Unlike Mrs TA, who gives the kids the shits occasionally with her busybody attitude.
Whenever Miss 14 was moody over the ex-bf, I gave her no illusion that I wasn't going to fix it for her, and it was part of the learning curve. Just like I told the boy, who has unlocked Girlfriend Acheivement at 17, that teen pregnancies were not just about fucking his life up, but everyone around him (including my unvoiced retirement plans).
I've only met the daughter's ex-bf once face to face which I didn't mind, as they started this shit when they were 13 ffs. Seen him outside school a handful of times. Heard about his health and family issues second hand, but it is clear he's not 100%.
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the boy, having unlocked Girlfriend Acheivement at 17, that teen pregnancies were not just about fucking his life up, but everyone around him (including my unvoiced retirement plans).
On this point: I ran him through the various protection methods and recommendations. he's got an older female friend who is a good source of advice as well.
However, he used my staff loyalty card at Woolies one day, forgetting that it updates my app with alerts for "New Receipt".
The word "Durex" featured prominently in one update, for which I was equal parts amused, nervous, and appalled that the silly bastard forgot about it. Good thing his Mum doesn't have access to my receipts....
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the boy, having unlocked Girlfriend Acheivement at 17, that teen pregnancies were not just about fucking his life up, but everyone around him (including my unvoiced retirement plans).
On this point: I ran him through the various protection methods and recommendations. he's got an older female friend who is a good source of advice as well.
However, he used my staff loyalty card at Woolies one day, forgetting that it updates my app with alerts for "New Receipt".
The word "Durex" featured prominently in one update, for which I was equal parts amused, nervous, and appalled that the silly bastard forgot about it. Good thing his Mum doesn't have access to my receipts....
In the good old pre-internet days it would have said ciggies and penthouse too....
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
Per the Straya thread https://www.forum.thesilverfern.com/topic/3682/straya/141 I mentioned my 14yo daughter chose today - a public holiday - to break up with her bf of roughly 13 months.
After a few episodes of drama, where the guy hereafter referred to as That Skinny Dickhead (TSD) started getting a bit on the needy side, she finally made her mind up that the pros weren't outweighing the cons. TSD had been accusing her of spending too much time with her friends and not enough time with him, even tho she has made multiple efforts to hang out with him this summer holidays and he finally came over to our house to meet us only a month ago.
Part of me feels for TSD - first of all he was punching well above his weight in looks, smarts, and personality - but he also appears to have a fairly ordinary home life and some health issues that keep him skinny. Doesn't sound like his Mum is much into fixing them. On the flipside, he's not sporty, not academic, and has spent most of the holiday period staying up late on his Xbox and then waking up after noon. And hey, 14yo me would have probably done something similar... if I had anything resembling an Xbox.... and if I didn't live on a farm...
Anyway, she did it. Quite impressed there is no wailing and bullshit from her at this point, and it is a load off her mind obviously.
If I might be a Grumpy Old Man for a moment: fucked up a perfectly good public holiday.
Is it normal behaviour for a Dad to be involved so much in teenage daughters boys life? Or are you a massive outlier in the relationship you have with your daughter.
Serious question.
Speaking from the other end of that long tunnel, I can echo much of what @NTA and @canefan have said. You cannot and from the opinion I have formed of you, will not, stand by and see your daughter make a dreadful mistake that will likely fuck things up for her and those around her but also you cannot interfere. Guidance, advice when requested and if necessary some underhanded manipulation.
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
Not a criticism, it's a question. Preparing myself for Miss about to turn 8's teenage years.
It really depends on your family dynamic, and what the relationship is like with other siblings etc.
My wife treats the kids like kids while I started to treat them like adults at the point where they started high school.
Sure as shit, once they're in the big pool of teenage hormones, they need to adapt and become resilient at fair speed. It won't go perfectly, but the helicopter parents I see in our circle are suffering because of it.
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@catogrande said in Parenting:
and if necessary some underhanded manipulation.
I have a shovel, a chainsaw, and a working knowledge of all State Forests within an hour of my house.
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the boy, having unlocked Girlfriend Acheivement at 17, that teen pregnancies were not just about fucking his life up, but everyone around him (including my unvoiced retirement plans).
On this point: I ran him through the various protection methods and recommendations. he's got an older female friend who is a good source of advice as well.
However, he used my staff loyalty card at Woolies one day, forgetting that it updates my app with alerts for "New Receipt".
The word "Durex" featured prominently in one update, for which I was equal parts amused, nervous, and appalled that the silly bastard forgot about it. Good thing his Mum doesn't have access to my receipts....
In the good old pre-internet days it would have said ciggies and penthouse too....
Might just be me, but I still get a quick excited nervous feeling go through my stomach at the mention of the word penthouse.
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@majorrage said in Parenting:
the boy, having unlocked Girlfriend Acheivement at 17, that teen pregnancies were not just about fucking his life up, but everyone around him (including my unvoiced retirement plans).
On this point: I ran him through the various protection methods and recommendations. he's got an older female friend who is a good source of advice as well.
However, he used my staff loyalty card at Woolies one day, forgetting that it updates my app with alerts for "New Receipt".
The word "Durex" featured prominently in one update, for which I was equal parts amused, nervous, and appalled that the silly bastard forgot about it. Good thing his Mum doesn't have access to my receipts....
In the good old pre-internet days it would have said ciggies and penthouse too....
Might just be me, but I still get a quick excited nervous feeling go through my stomach at the mention of the word penthouse.
Always had a surge of nervous energy when you rocked up to the dairy to buy a men's magazine. Good old Penthouse forum, "I never believe the stories in here, but the craziest thing happened to me....."
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@rancid-schnitzel said in Parenting:
The drama probably isn't over yet. He'll make a farking Tiktok video about it or something. Or he'll commit self-harm after watching a farking Tiktok video. Social media has created a new level of demented.
And if he does something like that, the daughter will be horrified.
From her post-action report at the scene of the breakup, he didn't realise how much he was hurting her, cried a bit, and they parted friends. Hopefully that means she talked him down enough to realise that the world isn't ending.
I remember being cheated on and I thought the world was going to end. At least I had alcohol to try and prove it.
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@rancid-schnitzel said in Parenting:
The drama probably isn't over yet. He'll make a farking Tiktok video about it or something. Or he'll commit self-harm after watching a farking Tiktok video. Social media has created a new level of demented.
And if he does something like that, the daughter will be horrified.
From her post-action report at the scene of the breakup, he didn't realise how much he was hurting her, cried a bit, and they parted friends. Hopefully that means she talked him down enough to realise that the world isn't ending.
I remember being cheated on and I thought the world was going to end. At least I had alcohol to try and prove it.
Social media has to suck ass for relationships these days. Kids don't really have a filter with stuff they mindlessly put out. As many a young English cricketer can attest to, that stuff is always out there
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@majorrage Black Label edition!
