Movie review thread...
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Just see it
Mark Rylance is a hoot
5 fores out of 5 Opens
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The Harder They Fall
To be fair, I didn't know what I was watching when I started this.
First - I assumed a Western with all black(/Black?) actors/characters - and I figured... sure, why not?
But, I soon suspected this was not that good...
Eventually I realised it was a "modern Blaxploitation Western"... and it started to make more sense.
And I could enjoy some of the aspects...- Particularly: Style over realism
- Style over realism can be good, and was good. Stupidly stylistic gunfights. Stupidly stylistic dance-shows/decor in western taverns.
- Contemporary music, dancin', etc
- over-the-top "it's-a-white-town" commentary
But - it was missing some critical aspects...
- Titwatch: zero
AND - there's one aspect of Blaxploitation and similar genres which I've never been able to cope with, and which this movie decided to stay true to....
- fucking stupid plot holes
Fuck, I hate stupid/ridiculous plot. This would have been a reasonably enjoyable romp, but for that.
2 inexplicable early-plot decisions by the baddies out of 5 inexplicable middle-plot decisions by the goodies.Edit: the more I think about this, the more angry I get... who takes a genre, takes some time, and keeps "stupid plot" but throws away "gratuitious nudity"? What the actual fuck?
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@Kruse said in Movie review thread...:
The Harder They Fall
To be fair, I didn't know what I was watching when I started this.
First - I assumed a Western with all black(/Black?) actors/characters - and I figured... sure, why not?
But, I soon suspected this was not that good...
Eventually I realised it was a "modern Blaxploitation Western"... and it started to make more sense.
And I could enjoy some of the aspects...- Particularly: Style over realism
- Style over realism can be good, and was good. Stupidly stylistic gunfights. Stupidly stylistic dance-shows/decor in western taverns.
- Contemporary music, dancin', etc
- over-the-top "it's-a-white-town" commentary
But - it was missing some critical aspects...
- Titwatch: zero
AND - there's one aspect of Blaxploitation and similar genres which I've never been able to cope with, and which this movie decided to stay true to....
- fucking stupid plot holes
Fuck, I hate stupid/ridiculous plot. This would have been a reasonably enjoyable romp, but for that.
2 inexplicable early-plot decisions by the baddies out of 5 inexplicable middle-plot decisions by the goodies.Edit: the more I think about this, the more angry I get... who takes a genre, takes some time, and keeps "stupid plot" but throws away "gratuitious nudity"? What the actual fuck?
File under 'Right On and fuck right off'
Unlike the Blaxploitation movies of the 70s, no-one will be talking about this 50 years hence.
NO ONE
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@MiketheSnow what a story, I really hope they didnt embellish it!
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Hey @Kruse
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@Bones said in Movie review thread...:
Hey @Kruse
Once again... fuck you @Bones.
Force of Nature
I'm too tired to really give this a proper go, but...- Hire a shitty anonymous stucco apartment building for a couple-days
- Throw Mel Gibson a few lines of coke
- Pour some water around occasionally, to suggest there's a "Force-fucking-5" hurricane outside
- And... this is key... do NOT show any titties. That's right... tit-watch: zero
... you get Force of Nature
Movie was summed up for me in the very first scene, which is a clever "actually, this happens later in the movie, but we'll set the scene for you with a flash-forward"... (very clever... I can't believe this isn't done more often by hacks, no... wait... )... has Mel Gibson with a pistol, agonising over how to make a precision shot on two guys fighting (how do I shoot the bad guy when he's so close to the good guy, when I've only got this shitty pistol!?). While a bint behind him is holding a scoped rifle.
Throw in some semi-nonsensical main plot, some majorly-nonsensical attempts at late-plot "twists", an overly telegraphed "gag-death" which turns out to actually be the ultimate death/climax - and... you get an underwhelming stew of... fuck you Bones.
BTW - What is it with these shit movies and their attempts at one-liners? I can understand shitty effects. I can understand shitty acting. I can kinda understand shitty plot/general-dialogue. But... for somebody to WRITE some ultra-shitty "gag", then somebody to actually SAY that same ultra-shitty "gag", and THEN... for somebody editing the movie to not delete that ultra-shitty "gag"... genuinely confuses me. It just reeks of "ahhh... fuck it. leave it in, I can't be arsed trying for anything better."Fuck you Bones.
1 mish-mash-of-a-bad-guy out of 5 mish-mashes-of-good-guys.
Did I mention tit-watch was zero? Which was a shame, as the chick-cop looked to have potential, despite doing her best(/worst) cutesy-wutesy Tina-Fey type impression.
(Google confirms - Stephanie Cayo, Peruviana - can be hot-as-fuck when permitted to be) -
@Kruse said in Movie review thread...:
@Bones said in Movie review thread...:
Hey @Kruse
Once again... fuck you @Bones.
Force of Nature
I'm too tired to really give this a proper go, but...- Hire a shitty anonymous stucco apartment building for a couple-days
- Throw Mel Gibson a few lines of coke
- Pour some water around occasionally, to suggest there's a "Force-fucking-5" hurricane outside
- And... this is key... do NOT show any titties. That's right... tit-watch: zero
... you get Force of Nature
Movie was summed up for me in the very first scene, which is a clever "actually, this happens later in the movie, but we'll set the scene for you with a flash-forward"... (very clever... I can't believe this isn't done more often by hacks, no... wait... )... has Mel Gibson with a pistol, agonising over how to make a precision shot on two guys fighting (how do I shoot the bad guy when he's so close to the good guy, when I've only got this shitty pistol!?). While a bint behind him is holding a scoped rifle.
Throw in some semi-nonsensical main plot, some majorly-nonsensical attempts at late-plot "twists", an overly telegraphed "gag-death" which turns out to actually be the ultimate death/climax - and... you get an underwhelming stew of... fuck you Bones.
BTW - What is it with these shit movies and their attempts at one-liners? I can understand shitty effects. I can understand shitty acting. I can kinda understand shitty plot/general-dialogue. But... for somebody to WRITE some ultra-shitty "gag", then somebody to actually SAY that same ultra-shitty "gag", and THEN... for somebody editing the movie to not delete that ultra-shitty "gag"... genuinely confuses me. It just reeks of "ahhh... fuck it. leave it in, I can't be arsed trying for anything better."Fuck you Bones.
1 mish-mash-of-a-bad-guy out of 5 mish-mashes-of-good-guys.
Did I mention tit-watch was zero? Which was a shame, as the chick-cop looked to have potential, despite doing her best(/worst) cutesy-wutesy Tina-Fey type impression.
(Google confirms - Stephanie Cayo, Peruviana - can be hot-as-fuck when permitted to be)ahhh....YOU ARE WELCOME
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King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
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@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
This review sounds way over the top.
Are you afraid you’ll get a slap if you give it a lower mark ?
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@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
This review sounds way over the top.
Are you afraid you’ll get a slap if you give it a lower mark ?
Okay maybe a 4.5? Probably speaks more to their story than the brilliance of the film
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@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
This review sounds way over the top.
Are you afraid you’ll get a slap if you give it a lower mark ?
Okay maybe a 4.5? Probably speaks more to their story than the brilliance of the film
Your review will do. No desire to see it and Will Smiths dickheadness is enough to confirm my view.
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@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
This review sounds way over the top.
Are you afraid you’ll get a slap if you give it a lower mark ?
Okay maybe a 4.5? Probably speaks more to their story than the brilliance of the film
Your review will do. No desire to see it and Will Smiths dickheadness is enough to confirm my view.
Read a book about it. One of the great sports stories of my lifetime
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@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
This review sounds way over the top.
Are you afraid you’ll get a slap if you give it a lower mark ?
Okay maybe a 4.5? Probably speaks more to their story than the brilliance of the film
Your review will do. No desire to see it and Will Smiths dickheadness is enough to confirm my view.
Read a book about it. One of the great sports stories of my lifetime
I only bother with Rugby, Cricket and boxing books.
Tempted to flag the first one.
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@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
King Richard
What an amazing story, even more miraculous because its true. Acting was good, but the story itself was the star. The film did a decent job trying to relay the dangerous life they had in Compton, showcased the strength of the family unit and the tennis was plausible. I didn't realise that the Williams pioneered the open stance groundstroke, but it was implied they were at the forefront, an excellent film on many levels. 5 flabbergasted coaches out of 5 GOATs
This review sounds way over the top.
Are you afraid you’ll get a slap if you give it a lower mark ?
Okay maybe a 4.5? Probably speaks more to their story than the brilliance of the film
Your review will do. No desire to see it and Will Smiths dickheadness is enough to confirm my view.
Read a book about it. One of the great sports stories of my lifetime
I only bother with Rugby, Cricket and boxing books.
Tempted to flag the first one.
If you want a great tennis book. The Andre Agassi biography is brilliant
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Top Gun: Maverick.
Second viewing today.
I have never ever gone back to the cinema to re watch a movie.
But Junior wanted to watch this.
And by fuck I'm glad I did.
What am awesome movie.
Yeah, it's implausible as fuck. ##spoiler
I mean stealing a 40yo F14 and taking off on a taxiway with a fuel tank within the OLS (showing off coz I know what that means
)
##endspoiler but it was fun.Park ##spoiler
the chick who wasn't particularly likeable and the Star Wars ... the real original and only Star Wars ... story of flying up the valley to hit the ventilation chamber ...
##endspoiler but as someone pointed out to me that everything you wanted in a sequel was there.Junior loved it. Gave it 4 ##spoiler
touching Iceman moments and gratuitous explosions
##endspoiler out of 5 ##spoiler
beach football scenes not to mention loud bangs and multiple G forces.
##endspoilerMe. Second time around 4.5 from 5.
The Phantom of the Open (2021) ⭐ 7.0 | Biography, Comedy, Drama
